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Being for the Benefit of Brunch

So.

Brunch.

I'm a Portlander, so even though I don't brunch much, I think about it. It's a chance for people to hang out, commiserate, day-drink, possibly (on given Sundays) watch football, and get valuable waiting practice because come on, we can always queue better. Anyway. Brunch. It keeps getting boosted. Some enterprising restaurant has to've used the slogan "It's brunch time somewhere!" If not, GET ON THAT. Other ideas:

A restaurant could advertise its brunch with a picture of two people eating together, captioned "To dine by your side is such a heavenly way to dine." It'd have to be a vegetarian place, or Morrissey would be pissed. (Also, the slogan "Caligula would have brunched"? BAD IDEA.)

Another slogan: Sherlock has a hunch he'll deduce more clearly with brunch. Huh. That's very mid-20th-century-ad style. I have not time-traveled, I swear (other than the time travel into the future one minute at a time which all of us are always doing all the time).

Maybe create a home market for it. "Brunch at home with Brunch MunchTM!" The bulk version'd be Bunch o' Brunch MunchTM! Oh, wait: some brunch places do take-out. The home market's covered. Never mind. *slides Brunch MunchTM patent into a drawer*

Some brunch place could flat-out make up a legend about the creation of brunch! How a waffle and a sandwich ran into each other and went "We belong together! Let's invite in Bloody Marys and some coffee, too!" How brunch was called Lufest until someone realized that sounds like a type of fish paste!

Good. I'm posting this in time for brunch.