Chris Walsh (chris_walsh) wrote,
Chris Walsh

Habits, one year gone

Just over a year since I ended my hospital job, and it doesn't completely feel like it's been just over a year.

My habit patterns are still there.

In my last year of work at OHSU up on Marquam Hill, I got into certain patterns, especially about commuting: the walk-bus-walk-Portland Aerial Tram-walk that was my morning commute, the various routes I used for getting off the hill -- maybe the Tram, maybe buses, maybe one of a few sidewalks or footpaths off of the hill -- occasionally varied but often recurring. I don't do them now -- I'm not D-FENS in Falling Down, still commuting to a job that no longer exists (and isn't that one of the disturbing details of that film, huh?) -- but I remember the sights. The night on the tram that reminded me of the opening of Blade Runner. The discoveries of interesting nooks and crannies on and around the hospital grounds. It's a confusing but dynamic campus, after all. And the hospital food's actually not bad.

(That last thing is not a sighting of anything, but I thought it's worth noting.)

That version of the job ended, followed soon by the job -- I went to working-from-home, then found that wasn't for me at the time and quit -- and I took time off, resetting my mind and resetting my patterns. It's been a strange, often difficult year-plus since then, and certain new patterns are asserting themselves -- I feel like being vague here, my apologies -- but the old patterns, they kind of nudge me. Say "remember doing this?" And reminding me that a year-plus ago isn't really that long ago.

I'm not sure how coherent this is. (It's definitely not profound, but I don't feel like trying to be profound right now.) This is me thinking through journal words. Remembering stuff. Including patterns. Which are easy to remember, simply from doing them so often.

(Okay, now part of me's trying to sound profound. Stop it, Chris. You don't need to do that.)

Anyway. Chimed in, I have. Another pattern of mine. I'd missed posting.

May this be a relaxing night for us all. That should be a pattern.

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