Chris Walsh (chris_walsh) wrote,
Chris Walsh
chris_walsh

Friday: from wanting to say "bite me" to actually biting myself (Mood Chronicles!)

Yesterday, while at work, I was a pill ("Slang. a tiresomely disagreeable person"). Managed to tank my mood, which had been good, in the afternoon. I made myself so want to snap at people, be unfair, be a jerk...and this was my response to me, not someone else, getting something wrong. I reined in my desire to be snappish, because doing any of that would not have helped. I would've felt worse, and I would've made others feel worse. I shouldn't make my issues other peoples' issues; and, at least, I didn't (or I feel like I didn't). Small victories, yes?

Later, at home and at dinner, I chomped hard for the second time this week on the right inside of my cheek, and was so glad (as glad as you can be when you hurt yourself like that) that I was in the dining room by myself at the moment. It's awkward, being near someone who's just chomped their cheek like that. I winced and flailed, but was seen only by the cats, not by either of the paying housemates (one who was out, one who was in another room). And I stayed quiet, though I wanted to yell or bark or something loud. But, again, that would've worried someone, and I didn't want to cause that.

I think/hope my sense of humor's been returning. Soon after, I flossed, noticed a red chunk of something had come out of my mouth, and thought "I hope that's tomato skin, not me-skin."
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