Stoner convenience store clerk Mark Zuckerberg is trying to do right by his great, patient girlfriend Bella Swan -- though he's better at smoking weed and buying fireworks from Toulouse-Lautrec -- and is completely unaware that he was once trained to be an assassin, until demoted CIA bigwig Mrs. Coach shows up to speak code to him that activates his skills (surviving an attack by Boyd Crowder) in order to save him from an even more dangerous CIA program run by Venom, all of this happening under the gaze of an angry President Whitmore.
(I like that next year we'll be able to replace "Mark Zuckerberg" with "Lex Luthor.")
