Chris Walsh (chris_walsh) wrote,
Chris Walsh

You hear the secrets that I keep, 'cause I blog about them

I talk to myself. At least I am assured I have a rapt audience.

I can't really blame 12 years of living by myself in a studio apartment for this, as I've done this since I was a kid. It was, for instance, one way I'd wind down at night, and I almost always had my own room so that wasn't a big deal. (My brother T.J. could drop off to sleep seemingly at will. As a fan of sleep, I've tried to learn that skill, but I digress.)

But I've been asked not to talk to myself as much, which made me think Yeah, I probably do do that too much. I wonder what the motivation is: does the thought seem more concrete and better formed if I say it, not think it? Do I at least think so? Have I trained myself to think so? Well, I can untrain.

Not the sort of training you'd find in a Rocky film, but I'm not Rocky Balboa or Adonis Creed. (I'm hearing very good things about Creed, by the way.)

I'm untraining myself in other habits. Or at least trying to. I realized, after once again living in a house for a while, that if I say something to my housemates, I almost immediately follow it with humming, voicing a few notes of something tuneless. Pleasantries exchanged, followed by almost-music. "Hi!"; "Hi! Hmmm-mm-nnn-nnnnn..." Kind of like that.

If I'm noticing this and starting to get annoyed by it, do my housemates (and anyone else I'm often around) notice it? Wonder about it? Get possibly annoyed by it? MAYBE.

I admit I have...not necessarily a problem, but an issue. And in certain cases, humming's a good idea -- so I, for instance, don't sneak up on/surprise people. Not quite as cool as having theme music follow you, but what's that cool?

Edit to add: And today I paid attention to how often I do this at work. And in public. half the battle. Or some percentage.

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