My friend Heather G. saw that it was a low day for me. She, her partner Chris T., and I met for dinner at the restaurant where Gerald, who's friends with both me and Heather, works. It was a treat, but it was awkward; the three of us eating had each had a day of frustrations. (And one really good and happy thing for Heather and Chris T., but that's not my story to tell.)
We all felt subdued and "off." Plus, in the noise of the restaurant, and with all of us in not-the-best moods, it was hard to have a flowing conversation. It helped, though, that we were gentle with each other. Heather and I have known each other for years, and understand (enough) each others' issues. We knew not to force things. All three of us apologized to the others about our moods, and did our best to work through them.
We wrapped up dinner, hung out for a few minutes outside the place with Gerald, then went our separate ways, still subdued but feeling a little better for having visited. I headed home on a bus where the fairly gregarious driver recognized me and waved me on: "I know you're good," I think he said. A nice moment of connection.
I'm tired and frustrated still, but I know what to do to work through that, how to compensate for that until I feel more consistently good.
Take care. I'm trying to.