January 28th, 2010

Me 1

A terrible lack in my education

I was sadly bereft of teachers who were hot.

Thirteen years of primary school, four years (and one make-up term) of college, and I was probably taught by dozens of people in that time, but the law of averages FAILED ME. Even my epic ability to find hotness or the crush-worthy failed me in this regard. Boring me, having crushes on people close to my age! I think cases of puppy love, I can't think of any until I think back to (I think) a San Diego babysitter who I followed around like a puppy, ignoring (here's the sign I was infatuated in that special little-kid way) MY ICE CREAM. It was cold soup by the time I got back to the kitchen.

I didn't do that, or want to do that, with any of my teachers. Later, of course, I developed a proper respect for ice cream. ;-) But also my teachers were, simply, teachers. Doing a job, usually (if I remember correctly) doing it decently, but my memories do not include my heart going pitter-patter about any of them. No mooning over them. Gee, I had to respect them and the job they do; heck, even consider being a teacher, to the point that I did TA-like duties while at the University of Oregon.

David Lee Roth never would've sung about any of them.

It took until freakin' college for me to get a Hot TeacherTM. For one term, in Spanish. And she fit one particular type of mine, a type best summed up as "Michelle Forbes." (Star Trek: The Next Generation! Homicide: Life on the Street! Battlestar Galactica! That bit of Lost! I've liked Forbes for years.) Which is kind of a severe look, a kind of severe look I can like, but we're not talking Kate Winslet. Or Sheryl Crow, who actually WAS a teacher earlier in her life! Think about: there's a brace of people who were grade school students in the St. Louis area in the early Eighties, and their music teacher became a famous singer. Who was and is also famously hot. How many of them had crushes on her? THIS I ASK. And I can imagine the answer.

Unfortunately, I did not go to school in St. Louis. Drat, I would've been the right age, too. And thus, for that and many reasons of circumstance, my experience of hot teachers is limited. Too, too limited. I feel deprived.

Except now there's always the chance I can fall for someone my age or reasonably close to mine who is a teacher. It could happen. But it's not the same! Never mind that I actually could have a relationship with such a lady, that it could truly lead to something the way student-teacher crushes usually don't (and they SHOULDN'T, 'cause, really? Teacher-student hookups? OFTEN KIND OF CREEPY), it's just not the same. Just not the same.

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