Chris Walsh (chris_walsh) wrote,
Chris Walsh

Fuller Disclosure: what I've been up to, what I haven't been up to

I'd been slacking.

I hadn't gotten much done the past couple of weeks. At least part of this was me being tired at the continued pandemic and quarantine, and being stuck Not Doing Much because of that. My big accomplishment in that period was finally getting my car towed off, but then, again, Not Much otherwise got done. And donating the car meant I had a couple of other errands to do: telling Oregon DMV and my insurance company that the car was no longer mine. I took a while to get around to that. I hadn't done any of it by last Friday.

Monday I finally started. I called the DMV call center in the morning (not as early as I'd first hoped, though), got in the queue to talk to a person, and waited. The call was ultimately over 50 minutes, but hey, I had the time. And once I reached a CSR, it was a quick thing to get my info updated. The CSR was nice, too. (Even when they aren't, I do my best to be nice and accommodating to them. I've spent years total as a phone bank CSR. I know the job can suck.)

After that, though, I didn't get much else done Monday. I could have contacted my insurance that day, too, but I didn't. I took it easy the rest of Monday and called Tuesday instead. Good. Another errand done. After doing that, I treated myself by walking to the just-reopened lobby of the McDonald's near me. Burger, fries, sweet tea and cookies, most of it eaten on the curb outside the restaurant.

I'd been slacking in my exercise, too. I've been doing two particular low-impact exercises at home, walking the basement stairs and doing wall push-ups. I can use more upper body strength, plus I could stand to lose some weight. I hadn't been doing those. I was still taking walks outside, but this part of Portland is fairly flat so you don't get much resistance walking. (No, I don't want to jog yet.) But I'd been getting into the habit of the stair walking and the push-ups, so in the past few days, realizing I was falling away from that habit, I've made sure to do them again. I remind myself that each exercise takes just a few minutes, and hey, I have the time. It's not like I need Dwayne Johnson's exercise regimen, the sort of routine that takes over your life.

By the way, something I feel good about: when I've been doing the exercises recently, I've been doing them for a little longer. Going from 50 wall push-ups at a time to 60. More times up and down the steps. A little more effort, I hope a little more reward.

The effort/reward ratio feels off, is the problem. The car errands don't change my situation, they just update it. The exercises don't seem to make much immediate impact, even though I know they've helped. Or, to change subjects, house cleaning: that feels like maintenance, not change or improvement, even though being in a cleaner space helps one's health. There's a reward, but it's not immediately obvious.

There will be a reward to waiting for my COVID vaccination, but that's not immediately obvious, either. I'm happy and relieved to know people who've started (some even finishing!) their regimens, and are waiting for the vaccine benefits to kick in. I don't know when that will happen for me, though. Soon. Maybe. When do my parents get vaccinated? When do my brother and his family? Again, not much to do but wait, both for the vaccination and for the benefits, for more and more people, to kick in.

And I'd forgotten — or, maybe this is more accurate, I'd avoided remembering — that waiting can be easier to deal with if you're actually doing stuff, at least as much as you can in this limited situation.

Yeah: it's tougher to be productive during the year we've had. I'm not the only one feeling this. But I'm trying to be productive. I want to do more than maintain. Maybe I'm getting to that goal. A simple, manageable goal.

Better is possible. As I've said before.

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