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What gets told?

I did not blog the entire time (Monday the 12th to Saturday the 17th) I was in Virginia for Robert's memorial.

Either I was busy or I was resting.

It's been a tiring time, for everyone in my family — for emotional reasons, obviously, but also due to dealing with Virginia heat and humidity, which I can handle but which I'm no longer used to, so it's an added stress — and we took it easy when we could. There were ups and downs. There was drama. There was almost-drama. There were laughs. There were difficult moments. There were wonderful moments.

Stuff happened. I could have blogged about it. But. One issue: limited internet access for most of my trip. Another, bigger issue: did I trust my blogging senses during the trip? Would I make good decisions about how to filter my experiences this past week so they'd be compelling blog entries? Would there be things I should blog about but forget to? Would there be things I shouldn't blog about?

A lot happened. What gets reinforced and what does not? What would make good stories and what would not? Would I over-remember some parts of this trip and not remember enough about other parts of this trip, based on what I wrote?

So not blogging was likely the smarter choice.

Things boil down to: we gathered. We shared stories, whether in a hotel lobby or over lunch or at the funeral home. We learned more about Robert. We made space for each other; sometimes we needed companionship, sometimes we needed to be by ourselves.

My one, shall we say, extracurricular trip — the one time I was with people not my blood family* — was seeing my friends Tarah and John, for dinner on Thursday the 15th. We covered a lot of ground on that visit. Tarah is a calming person; I feel better around her. John, her husband, is a good person. It helped to talk to them.

I'll recall, in a non-blogged way, what happened.

* Okay, pedants, other than when I was at, like, Dunkin' Donuts or Wawa or the nice bakery next to my hotel getting food. OTHER PEOPLE EXIST.


Whale fluke
Chris Walsh

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March 2023


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