"So what's all this I'm hearing about tree ports? It seems to me that you don't need to build a whole port for trees, which can't even move! Keep the ports for ships and tugs and those cute little sailboats..."
"Emily? Emily? He was talking about reports. RE-ports."
"RE-ports? Oh. That's different. Never mind."
Actual e-mail from actual me
Back in December 2016, I wrote this, called “Soup.” You can write poems about anything, and I decided to write a poem about soup. And because I…
“Luckily many [whales] know how to be gentle. “(This is somehow a real fact and not a detail of a Chuck Tingle novel.)”
Video. Talking on camera. I…I haven’t used it much; I haven’t done it much. I decided to change that. Now that my new tablet has enough ability to…