(…but a fairy tale that takes place very recently, more like Joe Versus the Volcano than Hansel and Gretel…)
Once upon a time, words were needed. There were plenty of word herders, each of them with some different style of word herding: some good with getting small or short words, some good with big, extensive or opulent words, some able to do the heavy lifting needed when you get a FLOCCINAUCINIHILIPILIFICATIONS. (I mean, where do you put it?)
Dawn turned out to be good at herding all sizes of them. (I’ve even heard that some of the words she’s herded were used, after being heard, by a filmmaker whose name you’ve heard. (NOW is your tongue numb?)) Words liked Dawn. Dawn liked words. Dawn and words started working together. Words now earn her money. Words also led her to the chocolate herds. She herds those herds now, into boxes of chocolate. Dawn can multitask.
Words told me it’s her birthday, to which I say: Word.
Happy birthday, Dawn. I heard it was happy.